if i must see you in my dreams, please don't wake me...

continuation..

yeah..after SO LONG...now i'm blogging part V..

so i think it's time to blog about the ending of year 2006..the last day we were gonna meet.. it was kinda sad..don't remember what we were doing that day.. but i know when we parted it was dark.. there weren't many people.. and i called my mom to pick me up and had to leave.. he sent me down..and we were a few steps away from the lift.. and i just said bye.. and we waved bye.. and i hit his hand.. actually, i wanted to hold his hand..but i didn't..and we parted like that..

so SPM was over..he came back online (during SPM, he moved his computer outta his room).. we didn't sms so much.. and neither did we chat online..i think we did at first..but it got lesser and lesser..and..by the end of december.. i lost hope..yeah..i actually lost hope..and that was the time i realize.. *shit..i like this guy* and i was telling myself for the past 2 years plus that i'm not ready for this...and here i was.. i fell into the hole..or trap.. or whatever you call it.. so i gave up.. i told myself.. these things weren't gonna happen to me..i told myself i don't wanna get hurt again..i told myself so many things and i managed to convince myself to forget about it..

and one day, chuan zhou asked suyen and i to go out.. his friend from japan or something came..he wanted to bring him to MV.. and andrew was going..i begged like mad to go.. and i got scolded also.. i dunno why i wanted to go so badly when i wanted to forget..hahahha..and that started everything.. we went out..and we were really like normal.. like nothing happen.. like we didn't have that silent episode during december..and we went to kim gary's to eat..suyen and i ordered fries.. i remembered.. i just took a fry and put in his mouth.. hahhaha.. and at that moment, i felt like.. everything's back to normal.. but i doubt it was gonna last..we're at different colleges.. and before we left that day, i asked cz..aren't you gonna kiss suyen goodbye? or vice versa.. and suyen or cz told me back.. aren't u gonna kiss andrew goodbye? nothing happened..we went home...

i went home and we smsed..me and drew.. and i think i got ..brave or something.. i asked him.. would he mind if i really kissed him goodbye.. and he said no.. and after that.. we planned to meet up..on the train..go to college together..me,suyen and him.. (that time i don't have car..license also belum dapat) and that's how the first monday we met.. i blogged it out.. i pecked him on the cheek.. hahhaa..in a way, must thank cz for that saturday outing.. and must thank nick for introducing him to me, me to him.. and must thank wei hui for introducing nick to suyen and i.. hahahhaha...