if i must see you in my dreams, please don't wake me...

it's been quite awhile since i blogged.. but hey, i'm having midterms and the concert is coming up..
i don't even have time..for drew soon... next week..rehearsal till 11pm..

anyway, i've been thinking back a lot... about how life went by.. MY life..
next wed is drew's bday and i'm thinking.. after his bday, a month later..it'll be mine.. i'm gonna be 18.. i actually lived 18 years of my life..
and looking at the month, it's June.. the last day of June.. i've been with andrew for 6 months..
just yday it feels like i pecked him on the cheek in the train station where i was totally.. blanked out.. time just passed like that.. it didn't feel like 6 months.. it felt like a few weeks with him.. maybe because having him around.. well.. like they say, time passes by quickly when u're having fun..

and to think after all the shit i got from vincent.. well of course i was stupid, dumb and.. blurr and NAIVE that time but... to think that... i got what i wanted.. i got andrew.. i don't wanna think much but in life u don't get what you want but.. i got it.. so is it a dream? is God gonna take him away? i prayed for love..yeah i did..when i was younger..little girl.. and i waited for God to answer my prayers.. he gave me an opportunity to love..but it wasn't.. i mistaken God's sign..
and now i've got the opportunity and even though i think i'm tougher after what vincent got me through.. i still don't know if it's for real.. i keep thinking how long is this gonna last.. yeah, deep down i want it to last as long as it can.. but sometimes, the other part of me tells me 'GAWSH, U'RE STILL NAIVE' and sometimes, i tell myself.. i can be a little naive sometimes...

i really don't know.. and honestly, for once, i've never even had the thought or imagination that we would be seperated.. because everything is just so wonderful... yeah, i've live without him.. but that was before i knew him.. and nobody said i'm gonna die without him either but... things would be so different.. much worse because i know if it was gone.. God is playing a very very bad prank on me.. but now here am i thinking.. why do i love him so much... yeah.. i think it's love.. we don't know what it is..but hey, u think u're in love when u're in love.. hahahah..

somehow, i think andrew emits this kinda... aura that makes me feel so damn comfortable around him..i know that was dramatic.. i mean, i know myself.. i can't hang out with guys.. i do stupid stuff.. i talk stupid stuff and make myself look stupid-er than the stupid me.. but with him.. i just.. can't explain.. it's simply.. mutual.. it's the only word i can use.. he asked me today, when did u started liking me.. and i somehow couldn't answer.. i've tried answering that many times to him.. and they always ended up with 'i dunno.. u're just special.. u're different.. i can feel it..' but it is the truth.. i can't explain it.. i just.. feel it.. and i'm very happy and proud that he's the only guy i kissed and hugged.. ^^ something simple that i treasure.. he's just so cuuuuttttttteeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! =P


well, i've no idea why i blogged about this..maybe because i FELT like it.. hahaha..
and since CHARMAINE asked me to put an ENTRY in my blog..
there you go char!!